New Photos Posted

New pictures up in Teagan's gallery. If you don't already have the link and password and would like to peruse it, shoot me an email.

So, don't get overly used to me posting pictures of Teagan here in the blog, but this one was too much fun to share. In response to my rant, our friends, Heather and Jason, found this onesie while on their honeymoon. W00t, w00t and double-w00t! Words can't describe how tickled I am! Thanks, Heather and Jason!

Two Thoughts

Thought #1:

I have a magic finger. With my magic finger, I seem to have the capacity to get my kid to stop screaming when all other avenues fail. I think it's the doing of this guy, who has a DVD which we were recommended by our friend, Ken, to watch. We did before Amy went into labor, and, whenever Bambina would have a crying jag at the hospital, I'd follow the advice given on the video, one part of which was to use your finger as a binka-bluffa-paci-corka-Nuk (or whatever you want to call the thing you stick in your kid's mouth to get it to be quiet). And still, almost two months later, if Bambina is howling (like this morning) and can't be otherwise soothed (like this morning), sticking my finger in her mouth seems to do the trick. Oh, it's not just any finger, mind you. It's the ring finger on my right hand. I should immortalize it, maybe have it bronzed or something...

Thought #2:

Here, presented for the first time is Bald Man Tom's BABY TO ENGLISH TRANSLATION MANUAL

Baby Speak	English
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I'm hungry!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I'm too cold!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I'm too hot!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	You're squeezing me too tight!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	You're not holding me tight enough!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	You're holding me wrong!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	MOMMY! DADDY'S A BUTTHEAD!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I'm tired!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I'm bored!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I'm lonely!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I've got a dirty diaper!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I've gotta burp!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I've gotta fart!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I've gotta make a dookie!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	Noone knows the troubles I seen...
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	You never let me do ANYTHING!
WAAAAAAAAAAAH!	I have just solved the worlds most troublesome problems! Hunger? Gone! Economic disparity? Gone! Ethnic and religious tensions? Gone! Global warming? Gone! And NOONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT I'M TRYING TO TELL THEM! WHERE'S MY NOBEL PRIZE?!
EURLEURLEURLEULREURL!	I AM NOT HAPPY! I AM NOT GOING TO BE HAPPY! I DON'T WANT TO BE HAPPY! NOTHING YOU CAN SAY OR DO WILL EVER MAKE ME HAPPY!

The varying translations are derived from subtle variations in pitch, volume, repetition and speed of speaking. Other translations are pending, as research is ongoing.

Bobble head Baby

Teagan had a doctor's appointment today for her first round of vaccination shots. She got four and let the office know she was not happy. She turned purple with her crying- poor kid.

Anyway some important stats-
She is weighing in at 9lbs. 9oz. - 35th percentile
She is 21 inches long- 25th percentile
and her head is measuring in 75th percentile (sorry don't remember the exact number) ! She is a little bobble head. No wonder she has a hard time lifting her head up.

One final note: More photos have been added to Photobucket if you are interested.

For the record...

Teagan's lungs work just fine, and our ears are numb.

I Keep Forgetting to Say...

THANK YOU, DARRIN. I'm not so sure my wife shares my sentiments, but I really had a blast! W00t!

Photo Gallery Update

We're back for the night. We spent Christmas day with my family down at my sister and brother-in-law's place. Much loot, food and fun was shared by all. I posted a few pictures up in Teagan's gallery. If you'd like the link and password, please drop me a note, I'd be happy to send them to you.

Tomorrow we're off to NE OH to stay with Amy's folks, and won't be back until the new year. We may not post before then, so if not, hope you all have fun and stay safe.

Just a Quick Note...

... to wish you all a safe and merry Christmas!

Even If Teagan Doesn't Like It...

... Kona and Sid think the carrier is pretty cool. It's not uncommon to find one or the other in the carrier when it's not otherwise occupied.

New Pictures

More pictures of Teagan posted in her gallery. If you'd like to see the gallery, please drop me a note and I'll send you the link and password.

Even If I Have to Sew It Myself...

I'm gettin' my daughter something black to wear!

Update: Evidently my post is confusing. If you could see the prodigious panoply of pink paraphernalia that our perfect, pulchritudinous pumpkin has procured, it might make more sense.

Teagan Update

So, here's an update for all of you out there in interwebland regarding the most beautiful daughter Amy and I have had the pleasure to have had so far. Well, at least the most beautiful human one we have, the cats are pretty darned cute in their own right. But first, a little background. Some of you will know some of this, a few will know pretty much all of this, but for most, this will all be brand, spanking new...

Teagan was born with a cleft in her soft palate. That makes breast feeding nigh impossible, and makes bottle feeding somewhat problematic, because she can't create enough negative suction to get the milk out of the bottle. Whilst in the hospital, the staff gave us a few "cleft lip/palate" bottles to try, but Teagan couldn't get anything out of them, so we returned to the standard bottles. When feeding her there, we were getting somewhere between 10-20 ml (~1/3 to 2/3) of fluid into her 6-7 times per day. Noone seemed too overly concerned, they just figured we'd all figure out the feeding thing and she'd go on her way gaining weight.

When we got home, we switched from the regular bottle/nipple we got from the hospital to an Avent bottle with a somewhat softer nipple. It didn't seem to help. Feedings took anywhere from 1 to 2 hours, with 1.5 being the norm. She'd normally take 20 ml (~2/3 oz) in that amount of time, sometimes as much as 30 ml (~1 oz). Our ritual was 1) try to wake the baby, 2) try to feed the mostly sleeping baby for 60-90 minutes, 3) change the baby, thereby finally waking the baby, 4) spend the next 60-90 minutes trying to get her to sleep, 5) wake her an hour later for her next feeding. It was exhausting and frustrating on all concerned.

End of background.

This past Monday, we had a nurse visit to do an evaluation on Teagan. She was absolutely alarmed how little she was eating, and how long it was taking. She told us she should be eating roughly 2 oz each feeding (~60 ml), 8 times per day, and each feeding should take between 20-30 minutes. The nurse put Teagan on the scale and she had lost about a half pound in the 4 days since her previous doctor visit. I think that was the point at which both Amy and I nearly lost it. Fortunately, the nurse calmed us down and made two suggestions. First, switch to the fastest flow nipple we could find (for the men in the audience, bottle nipples come in different flow rates for different ages of kids, slower flow are usually for newborns, while faster flow are usually for 6+ month), and second cram the nipple as far back in her mouth as we could get it. The nurse determined that, not only was she having problems because of the cleft, but she was also having problem because her tongue wasn't doing whatever it should have been doing correctly. Armed with this knowledge, we were able to feed her 60-80 ml (2 to 2-2/3 oz) per feeding over the next day. It took Amy longer than it took me, as she was somewhat more squeamish than I was about cramming the bottle down her throat.

That got us to yesterday, when we were finally able to get into the Craniofacial Clinic at Columbus Childrens' hospital. We had been referred there by our pediatrician to have Teagan's cleft soft palate evaluated. The first person we saw there was a nurse practitioner who also gave Teagan the once-over from head to toe. We explained to her the problems we had been having, and how the nurse had helped us the previous day with her feeding. She again suggested the cleft lip/palate bottle, and we told her that we had tried one with no success. Then she asked us if we'd been putting pressure on the bottle while feeding her, and we told her that noone had suggested that, so no, we hadn't. She ran and got a box of bottles and a couple of special orthodontic nipples, poured some milk into one of the bottles and showed us how they work. We both nearly cried with relief, because we were able to feed her the full 60-80 ml of milk in about 20 minutes without smashing the bottle into her face. She gave us the bottles and a supply of nipples and told us to call her for more when we run out. Feedings are no longer traumatic, and she's gained back in the last two days most of the weight she'd lost in the last week. The other good thing about the new bottles is that she's still encouraged to suck, which is important for the development of facial muscles she'll need once she gets around to thinking about putting words together to sass her dear old dad. We're quite relieved, as you can imagine.

The upshot of all this increased input is, quite naturally, increased output. We've had a couple of complete blow-outs, and at least three times in the last two days we've been in the middle of changing a soggy or poopy diaper when she lets loose with another volley. But, considering that peeing and pooping are signs that she's getting plenty of food and is no longer dehydrated, we really don't care.

So there you have it. In a nutshell, she eats, she poops, everyone is happy. In 10-11 months, Teagan will probably end up having surgery to repair the cleft in her soft palate, but that, in the inimitable words of Alton Brown, is another show.

Time Warp

One of the things I've noticed about parenthood is the total subjectivity of time. For example, it's currently 10:12 PM (as I'm typing this), but I can't figure out where the time all went so quickly. On the other hand, Teagan isn't quite 2 weeks old, but it seems like she's been around for a couple of months already. Weird...

Teagan's Photo Gallery Is Up

The title says it all. If you're interested, drop me a note at either tom (at) helsel (dot) com or baldmantom (at) yahoo (dot) com OR baldmantom (at) gmail (dot) com. I'll send you the link and the password to get in. Again, we're very, very happy to share pictures of our beautiful daughter, we're just trying to make it more difficult for the sickos to get her pictures.

One more Teagan post :)

Greeting from the Hospital Lobby! Tom is a nice guy and letting me borrow his computer. Teagan is sleeping peacefully in the nursery. Anyway, the hospital picture is finally up. She is a tiny baby in a big 0-3 month outfit.

Freakin'

Both Amy and I have major anxiety when Teagan sleeps. We're completely paranoid that she will have stopped breathing. So, we'll poke her, or pull on her swaddle, or rub her head until she grunts or moves, or we'll hunker down over the bassinet waiting to hear a breath (or a snore, she takes after her dad, at least according to Amy). This evening I almost lost it because I couldn't hear her, just a second before she had a start and scared the crap out of me. How on earth did those of you with previous experience with children get used to this?

Thoughts on 42 Hours of Fatherhood

• To clarify any uncertainty surrounding our daughter's name, it's pronounced, TEE'-gn. Several people have asked for phoenetic a spelling, so there you have it.
• In case you're wondering, we didn't make up her name. Depending on who you ask, it means either "beautiful" or "little poet," both of which we like quite a lot, thankyouverymuch.
• I'll never like changing a diaper, but it's no where near as bad as I thought it'd be.
• Teagan was born with a cleft soft palette. Of the different things which can be "cleft" on a newborn, we're told it's the least severe. She's been inspected by a couple of pediatricians now and they have given her an otherwise clean bill of health. Her soft palette will have to be repaired at some point, but it probably won't be done immediately. In the meantime, it's making nursing somewhat difficult, though she's figured out the bottle so she's getting nourishment.
• I need to work with Teagan on her burping skills. She's way too ladylike right now...
• My daughter is absolutely beautiful. I know that's what I'm supposed to think (one of the nurses told me that God makes babies so cute to their parents so that they'd survive into their teens) and say, but it's true. I just look at her and get all misty. I hold her when feeding her and it's just an awesome feeling. I watch her sleep, and I realize that I'm gonna need a shotgun to fend off all the boys by time she hits puberty.
• My wife is beautiful and strong. Those of you who don't know her as well don't know of her general distrust of all things medical. She hadn't been in a hospital, other than for a visit, since she was born. She's dreadfully afraid of needles. And her pain and "ick" tolerance is pretty low. But she was strong when they gave her the IV (which took three tries, BTW), was as calm as possible when they gave her the epidural (which she had been dreading since she got pregnant because it meant they'd be putting a needle in her spine), and was incredibly brave when they told her that she'd need to have a Cesarean. She never complained about it, even though she was so scared she was shaking, because she wanted what was best for her baby. If she's so willing to face her fears just to get that far, I have no doubt that she'll be a great mom.
• I've made my wife into a geek. We took Teagan to the nursery this afternoon so that Amy could check her email. I've even got proof!

In other news, we're going to be setting up a password-protected photo gallery for Teagan sometime in the near future. We've read about creepy people stealing pictures of infants or children, and either making crude and disgusting comments about them, or altering them in disgusting ways. So, to play it safe we're going the route of using a password-protected site. It will NOT be one that requires you to have your own account, you'll just need to know the password. We'll be happy to share the password with you once we've got it set up. Just send me an email to any of my regular accounts, and I'll be happy to send you the password once everything is in working order.

It's a...?

We're very happy to announce the birth of our daughter, Teagan Rae. She was born Wednesday, November 28, 2007 at 3:00AM. Teagan weighed in at 7 lbs 3 oz, and measured 19.5 inches. There was some drama around her birth, after 41 weeks and 3 days and a normal start to labor, she ended up being delivered Caesarean. Both Teagan and Amy are doing well. Thanks for all your prayers and well wishes!

Also, there should be a picture somewhere on the hospital's website sometime in the next few days:

Hopefully....

... it maybe time. Heading to the hospital. We'll let you know :)

Post Thanksgiving Nap

Ahhh- too cute! The girls survived family visiting on Thursday and today. Guess it must be time for a nap.

Surprise - No, It's Not Bambino

So, Amy and I were sitting on The Couch today, minding our own business, waiting for Bambino to decide whether s/he wants to make an appearance on his/her own or wait for the eviction, when our doorbell stirred us from our slumb... errr.... deep thoughts. On the way to the door, I noticed that, parked in front of the house, was a delivery truck. Surprised, because neither of us was expecting any sort of delivery, I opened the door and accepted the package, which turned out to be from our friends, Bill and Kay. Inside was a card, a pretty picture frame, and this:

This has to be one of the cutest, cleverest ideas I've seen using diapers. Thanks, Bill and Kay, you made our day today :)